Seasons

Guest Post by: Corrie Holderman 

We were sitting in a booth at a food court inside one of the many malls in Riyadh as I sat there quietly sobbing. 

It had been about a month since my husband and I left Southern California for our new desert home in Saudi Arabia. We had been married just over a year when we accepted jobs teaching ESL at a university in the capital city of Riyadh. Wedding gifts went in storage, and we kissed our family and friends goodbye. As 23 and 25 year old newly weds, we were ready for adventure. 

So, why was I sitting there crying all over my chicken shawarma? I will say, culture shock is a very real thing, and can definitely do a number on your emotions.  I'm sure that played a small part in my public display of emotion, but I wasn't crying because I was homesick, wearing a headscarf, dressed in black from head to toe, or because I was eating food I had never tasted before. The new dress code had its perks, and the chicken shawarma was one of the most delicious things I had ever eaten. I sat there in between sobs saying, "I don't know if I can raise a family here. Where are they going to go to school? How will our daughters feel about being raised in such a male dominated culture? How will we teach our sons to respect women in such a male dominated culture? Will our kids hate us for forcing them to grow up here so far away from their grandparents and the beach (sort of kidding about the beach-sort of)?" So many thoughts, fears and questions raced through my mind until my husband calmly interjected and said, "Um, we don't have kids." 

We didn't have kids at that time. I wasn't pregnant, and we weren't even planning on trying to start having kids for at least a few years. Yet, there I was, freaking out about our future children. In hindsight, it seems absolutely insane. 

Honestly though, how often do we all worry about things that we really don't need to. At the time, I had no idea how long we would live in Saudi Arabia. We ended up staying for three years, and we didn't even have children for another two years after we moved back to the States. All of that worrying and crying when I should've just been enjoying my delicious chicken shawarma and a night out with my husband. 

Our time in Saudi taught me many things. One of the biggest lessons I learned is that life is made up of seasons, and the thing about season's is-they change. Oh, how I wish I could go back and tell younger me that! 

I'm so thankful God was gracious to show me this early in my life. Though I don't even come close to doing this perfectly, remembering that all things are seasons has helped me to enjoy each one more fully or endure some more patiently. 

This perspective has been helpful in all seasons, but especially in the ever changing seasons of motherhood. When my second child was born, it was a really difficult transition from one to two. Quite honestly, it kicked my butt. I remember being up all night feeding her and then my two year old son waking up at 7am ready to start the day with so much energy (I guess 12 hours of sleep will do that to you). I was so exhausted, and it was hard to learn how to care for two children who both needed me so much when I felt like I didn't have much to give. I had to remind myself on a daily basis that it was a season-it wasn't forever. Though it was still hard, I was able to endure that season with hope and even enjoy many parts of it too. 

While it's good to remember that life is made up of seasons, that doesn't always make it easy, especially if you're like me and you're not as "go with the flow" as you wish you were. Some seasons seem to pass too quickly, others seem as if there's no light at the end of the tunnel, and the uncertainty of what season awaits can be scary. Thankfully, there is one thing that is constant and strong enough to sustain you in any season- God and His love. His love is described in the Bible as steadfast, unchanging, perfect, faithful, and everlasting. 

Lamentations 3:22-23 says, " The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness" (ESV).

I pray that this truth will bring you joy, peace, and hope no matter what season you are in. 

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